Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Sticky Situation


As I nurtured myself yesterday evening, instead of going out with a friend, I opted to sit on my couch, watching comedies and savoring an ooey, gooey chocolate caramel bar. It was sweet and salty and impossible to eat without drizzling over my fingertips, leaving a light sheen of sticky sugar.

While I opted out of stress, my phone was bringing other people's problems to me. First my friend and then her boyfriend were texting me about their relationship. This is my friend C, who's been dating two guys for the last year, much to everyone's continued dismay. They are both nice enough, but one of them, P, is so sweet and warm that S and I can't help thinking of him as a friend too. So when he texts me occasionally, seeking a shoulder to cry on or wanting advice, it puts me in a sticky spot.

Do I tell him what I think is best for him? Do I tell him what I think my friend C would want me to say? Plus I have to be loyal to her first, and not give away anything she has expressed to me in confidence. Plus, I'm not God. I don't know how or if their relationship should continue. That really needs to be up to them.

So last night I came up with a great solution. While telling P how much we like him, and how sorry I am for his pain, and generally supportive statements, I also suggested he seek advice from his good friend. I met M once and liked him a lot; I know he'll have P's best interests at heart. I'm pretty sure he'll tell him to just break up with a woman who can't decide to commit to him after a whole year of consideration. And that is probably good advice. No matter how awesome C may be, I think P can find someone who loves him as he is, with a lot less complication. So now, I don't have to say that, and possibly break my friend's heart. P can talk to M, and I can listen to and support C as she continues to try to figure out what it is she really is looking for from life.

Really, I just want to get back to my caramel.

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