Still Working

Just got off the phone from a LONG conference call with one of my clients. As usual, it was a pleasant and productive conversation. We discussed program details, shared new statistics, and clarified which funders to pursue next. As always, I am simply thrilled STILLto have a job with them. I don't know why, but there is this core of insecurity within me about all things writing and grant related. I always feel that my clients are about to whisk back the big curtain and exclaim, Wait! You're not a REAL grant writer! What's going on here?

So I always have this huge rush of relief when that doesn't happen. And of course that doesn't happen. It doesn't happen because when you talk to me on the phone, and listen to the questions I ask, and hear the things I point out, I sure as heck sound like a "real" grant writer. When you read my proposals, I do a very, very good job of impersonating someone who knows exactly what the heck she's doing. Just like when you read my fiction, I do an excellent job of sounding like a "real" writer.

Part of it is that I tend to immerse myself only in the writing of real professionals. Even the off-the-top of the head stuff that I read is written by people with wicked wit and talent. And, so, I forget that not everyone in the world can write this way. Clearly, and with interest and style.

Anyway, right now I am happy and productive. My client likes my work; I have new assignments. What more could I ask for?